pun

ooooh...pun of the day!
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God made mud
God made dirt
God made guys
So girls can flirt!
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how cool is that? eheheheeee...

injuries

INJURIES

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The weekend was just filled with it.

And I didn't even know until I went over to Godma's place last night for dinner.

And then I noticed.

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So here's Lesson 101 on how to injure yourself.

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Grampa's Injury

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First, you have to make sure that there is no electricity in the house.

Then, you have to try to make your way up the stairs yah - IN THE DARK!

Ok, here's the important part, remember to miss a step.

Slide down the stairs and make sure your arms are flailing aimlessly.

Your arms will then scrape across the stairs railings and you'll end up with a huge patch of raw skin on the inner arm, oozing fresh puss.

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Femme's Injury

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Make sure that the cellophane tape dispenser is thrown on the floor, landing upside down, before you walk away to do something else.

Forget that you threw the dispenser there and walk back to take something else.

Kick your toes really hard against the corner of the fucking thing (yes, I mean the rubberized, blunt corner).

Kick it sooo hard that the blunt corner can actually slice through your skin, causing it to bloom open like a flower, with fresh blood oozing out.

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It will look something like this

but this one takes the prize. Really. This one does.

Jojo's Injury

Take a walk in the jungle.
Make sure you're not looking where you're going and just continue to laugh and giggle with friends.

Okay, important note, you HAVE to make sure your foot gets stuck under a potruding tree root, because this will help send you flying - yes, it naturally turns you into SuperWoman, without the powers that is.

It will thus look like this





seriously! How can anyone do that to herself? It's just sooooo amazing!
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************************************
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Fatty Showed Off
.
last night when he brought me to his office.
he forgets that I work in a china-apek company and his is a public listed one.
just because he had this whole magical thingy where you press a button hidden on a screen in the wall and music comes on and you can even change the music to whichever one you like
.
So.Damn.Idiot!

jinxed

I think I'm jinxed...well, at least to the future-in-laws I am.
That is IF they still want me as a daughter-in-law lah.
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*femme sighs*

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5 months ago, fatty and I went to Velvet.
We went there to meet up with JamieLing and gang.

Fatty had a little too much to drink and so, I had to drive home.
.
I crashed the car on the way home

Okay, crashing the car wasn't really the issue.

The issue was the fact that fatty has never never crashed his car ever.
And then femme had to drive.
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And then, recently, just over the weekend, I was at fatty's place.
We were getting ready for dinner and I was fresh out of the shower.
People here happily skipped to the plug point, plugged the hair-dryer in and started blowing the hair.
.
Suddenly POOF!!! the dryer stops, ASTRO in room shuts down, ASTRO downstairs shuts down, computer goes off, iron shuts off.

And femme is left with one side of head straight hair and the other, frizzles.
Apparently, voltage on femme's hair-dryer too high.
House cannot tahan. So tripped lah the main switch.
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***************************
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SO IN LOVE
.
was just watching him sleep that day.
his lips slightly parted, his eyes closed.
he looked so harmless, so absolutely adorable.
i can't believe i've found someone to love,
and for that someone to love me back.
it was sooooo beautiful.
a tear trickled down my cheeks.

femme is utterly and finally deeply in love.

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***************************
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Hey Fairy!
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heard your "single's" party was great although there were more guys then gals.
sorry I didn't make it, will be there for the next one - PROMISE!
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***************************
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Happy B'day, Pearlz!
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I know you liked the surprise!
Hope you like the pressie too.
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***************************
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Retard Angel
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came to my rescue!
while I was down and out and sniffing my nose off in the freezer we call office,
in he comes, carrying a tray of drinks from Starbucks.


with a glass of freezing, ice-cold Raspberry Frap!

MY BOSS FELL ASLEEP
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during a product demonstration from a Taiwanese company
and his head kept lolling off to one side
i was so scared it might fall off!
and finally, it lolled off so hard, his forehead hit the table
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and i guess that woke him up
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I almost died laughing!
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***************************
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I COULDN'T TAKE MY EYES OFF IT
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it was dangling there, right under her right nostril
and the more she talked and moved,
the more the damn thing moved with her
and i just couldn't hear a damn thing she was saying cos my eyes were too focused on it
.
dammit!
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***************************
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KinkyBlueFairy is throwing a SINGLE'S party
.
and I'm invited!
but then.... .....I'm not single
so does that mean I can't go?
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unless i pretend to be single, and then I'll go there and make loads of new friends!
it wouldn't be thaaaaat bad
i don't think fatty would mind it at all
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hmmmm.....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CrazyChristine!!!
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stoooopid rain last night
if it wasn't pissing down so hard, we would have met up for your birthday celebration
will make up for it this weekend, alright!
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but i'm sure you and FunnyVJ had a real romantic dinner

CONGRATS, CAV!
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before I forget to wish you...
wish your new wife for me too yah
sorry I couldn't make it on Sat night
as you know, was asleep and resting at home
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hope the party was GREAT even without me...

fatty and i literally slept right through the weekend.
we slept on Sat noon. Woke up for dinner. And slept again.
we slept on Sun night. Woke up for dinner at 2am. And slept again.

:<(

but before sleeping on Sun night, we were at Nad's Raya open house in GOMBAK.

she made so many things!
we had spagetti lah, lontong siam lah, all sorts of kuih lah.
she even had her very own chocolate fountain!

she paid like RM200 for that thing k.
siow!
if i had that in my house, I would be superFAT man...

Nads also has two gorgeous Pursian cats.

This one is called Troy and he has a thing for paperbags.

I don't think I'm ever gonna go to Gombak again.

***************************

The Streamyx at home is down again *sigh*

Stoooopid people who can't even fix a simple problem.

***************************

Surprise from Pearlz @ work this morning.

Knowing how much I absolutely adore geckos, she got me this....

It's in my car now...
Facing the clock....
Telling me to always hurry hurry hurry

Hopefully I'll never be late for work ever again!

Thanks, Pearlz babe! I LUUUURVE IT! *beeeeeeeeeeeeeg HUGS!*

LAST NIGHT

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was the wooooooorst night ever!

because Fatty was away at the launch, and I couldn't decide whether I wanted to join the girls at The Loft KL, I decided to join mum and dad for dinner.

they decided to go to Paramount

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WRONG MOVE!

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just our luck, the lights were down at one of the main junctions

naturally, there was a very very baaaad crawl

we were stuck at that lights for 25 minutes!

.

25 fucking minutes!

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i was soooo hungry until can mati

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then daddy got all upset and impatient

and impatience reared it's ugly head

in no time, i was stuck in between a war between mummy and him

while i sat miserably at the back seat, trying not to puke

and suffering silently from gastric

.

obviously....

i ended up asleep in bed at 9.30pm.

so much for a Friday niteeee.

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***********************************

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STREAMYX IS UP AND RUNNING again.....

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like FINALLY

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the internet line at home was down for the past 3 weeks

and finally....finally....the TM Net technicians came to fix the line

femmy was thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis close to calling the MD himself!

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anyways, i'm finally connected to the virtual world again

and i don't have to use working hours to blog anymore....yah right!

well, at least now i can blog from home and the office

it's already a friiiiiiiday
and yet, i don't feel like it is a friday at all
in fact, i feel shitty....

*femme sniffs*

i won't be able to see fatty today because he has to go for the launch of the newly re-branded Light & Easy FM....
now known as Light FM (or could it be Lite??)

........and i'm missing him terribly!

*********

Dharma Buddhist University

is a university where students go to learn more about Buddhism,
where they also go and learn how to mediate, elevate and become monks

they were holding an exhibition in the hall on the Ground Floor of the building where I work in and Pearlz and Lisaan literally draaaaaaaagged me in with them


EVERYTHING WAS IN FREAKING CHINESE....
and this ang-moh stuck in a chinese body here didn't know a damned thing what she was looking at.
so, naturally, she whipped out her handy camera-phone
(so excuse the blurred pics yaaaa....i need a new phone anyways. Did i mention that Pearlz dropped my phone in the toilet?)


So i was sooooo wrong
Not only do these students learn how to mediate, elevate and become monks, they actually learn wood carving and photography as well!
And boy were they gooooood!

Everything was just sooooo beautifuuuuuuul...
the wood carving were so detailed I could swear the Goddess was looking right at me

and of course, photography too
geee...i MUST learn to take pictures like that man...

so real....

so real until can die lah.....

the three of us walked out

unharmed! *phew*

POST DATED ENTRIES
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sooooooo many :( so bear with me okay cos this entry is gonna look really cluttered up.
will try my best to make sure it's still readable after I'm done with it.
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*********

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kache-chan took us for dinner in Sentul last week.
yah man...SENTUL okay! I mean, like who goes there anyways....
but apparently, the food is supposed to be really really yummylicious.



but it was so-so only lah...nothing to shout about


i think my niece is a little camera shy...
awww....but i still luuuurve you

i was bored!
the food took a little long to come and what do you expect a girl with a camera to do?
.

*********

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i went shopping!

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and got myself a pair of these cuuuuute lovelies....

*********

off to CHERATING.....again

but this time, it was for fatty. not me. apparently, fatty needed a break. *femme rolls eyes*

we released baby turtles that night. it was sooooo fun!

i had this ingenious idea in mind about how we could kidnap a turtle, nurture it until it's big enough and then bring it back to the sanctuary. at least one out of 50 turtles is confirmed safe. but fatty gave me that are-you-stupid-or-wat look and i decided i will not share any of ideas with him anymore.

hmph!

after playing with turtles, we went back and played with poison.

it was aaaaaaallll stevie's idea to play Ride The Bus and guess WHO rode the bus in the end???

fatty & me!

miraculously, i didn't totter back to the room. but i did crash the minute my head touched the pillow.

it was a really fun trip.
too bad stevie, jo, FunnyVJ and CrazyChristine couldn't stay an extra night.
that would have been soooo much better.

DILLUSIONAL?
.
me?
.
well, I don't think you know me enough to call me that, so has it ever occured to you that perhaps....
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YOU'RE THE DILLUSIONAL ONE!
.

*********

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thought of the day...

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would you or would you not attend a wedding when you know the ex-girlfriend is gonna be there?

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hmmm.....*femme shrugs*

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*********

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i'm going away for the weekend!

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it's gonna be fun fun fun! (i hope)

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will snap LOADS of pics....

The ex's current and the current's ex

It was mummy's 52nd birthday on Wednesday night
We celebrated at Jarrod & Rawlin's in Damansara Heights

Nice place, cooling and we had a little too much wine to start with...

and then suddenly, while i was trying to saw away at a very stubborn piece of steak...

.

hi! i just came over to say hi...

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this stranger was looking right at ME!

.

and i had no idea who this person was, but obviously, it was someone i know cos she was looking right at me

.

so naturally (like everyone else would), i got up and smiled

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hiiiiiiiiii.....how are you? (while furiously cracking my brains, searching for something that would remind me of this person)

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and then *lightbulb* it hits me. this is Des's new babe, Kate!
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wtf! i hugged my ex's new girlfriend? like hello! people don't do that! *femme knocks herself on head*.

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*********

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was lying in bed last night with fatty when he turns around and asks...

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remember the first time you had lunch in BBM?

yaaaah.....

was it a monday?

*thinks*....yaaaaah....

were there many people around?

*thinks**why is this idiot asking me such weird questions?**....erm....not many, why?

how many tables lah?

about 2 or 3 I guess, why?

was there a table with 2 girls?

*turns green* who were the 2 girls???

one of them was *inserts ex-gf's name*

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I. DAMN. Tulan!

of all places, of all times, of ALL people, his ex had to see me

and I don't even know her. Never met her before. And NEVER will.

fuck! I didn't even see her but then if I did, i wouldn't have known it was her anyways.

Apparently, she knew it was me cause she recognised my face from friendster pictures.

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I don't know what happened but I think my face might have turned into a horrendous shade of green cos fatty leaned over to hug me tight tight.

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You know I love you very much, more than anyone else I've ever loved, okay

*All smiles*......okay

but still DAMN TULAN.