The life of the Un-interesting

I haven't been blogging much as I've been too busy updating myself by reading other people's blogs. And by reading all these blogs, it's made me NOT wanna blog much anymore. It's so un-inspiring to realise that my life isn't a tad bit interesting at all.

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I mean, I don't get invited to events and launches of anything anymore like I used to, so I don't get to meet important or beautiful people anymore, or rub shoulders with the whos and whats while sipping on wine.

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No more dressing up and looking all ready to party because this mama ain't partying no more. No more clubs, or JD parties, or Mambo Jumbos, or whatever.

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I'm not a glamorous celebrity so I don't get stalked by psychotic looneybins. I'm not a famous blogger so I don't get other jealous bloggers giving me bad publicity. I'm not paid to do advertorials although advertisers do advertise on my site (thank you!!!).

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No. In fact, I'm just a half-crazed mother-slash-wife who's main reason in life is to scream at her one-oil cysted-eye daughter NOT to play with the dirty pink house slippers, who cracks her brain juice deciding what to cook for dinner (which doesn't happen very often anymore if you realise the lack of recipe blogs), who gets herself and daughter locked up inside a show house for more than half an hour, who's one excitement in life is the pasar malam on Saturday nights.

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AnnUma asked me, "So are you guys going away on a holiday anytime soon?"

And I replied, "You know the roadshow SK has to go on for work? Yeah, I'm following him".

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That's me. And the life I've become.

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Not the least bit interesting.

Hairkenstein

Welcome to femmefatale's museum of hair gone wrong.

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in Beijing - May 2007

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Here, as you can see, are a compilation of all the hairstyles I've gone through since I can't even remember when.

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Maya Hotel - Jan 2008

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But this, yes THIS, has got to be the worse one ever!

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no, not this...this was V Day 2006...ok, maybe this was quite bad too

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Instead of going to see Fred@LeVi as usual, I decided to try out a new place nearer home, hoping that they'll do a wondertasticlous job and I won't ever have to travel so far to do my hair again (remember, I'm now living in the 'countryside').

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New Years @ Singapore - 2005/06

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So, I walked into this saloon, it's called Evergreen by the way, so please enter only if you dare (or if you have too much money to waste) and told them exactly what I wanted - to color, trim, treat and reshape my out-of-shape hair.

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Gentings - Dec 2005

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I even showed them a picture so that they'd at least have a clue about what I was asking for and they nodded and assured me that they understood perfectly what I wanted. Of course, it didn't help with the fact that their English was atrocious and I couldn't speak cantonese for nuts.

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Camerons - May 2005

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4 hours later, I looked like this.

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yes, THIS!!!

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And I had to pay a whopping RM698 to look like this! And in 'this', I mean 'SHIT'!

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here, let me show you again...even Renee looks horrified

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Apparently, the treatment they gave me was some latest scientific technology from Kerastase, the color was some X brand from dunno which country and yada yada...

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My last words to them before I walked out were "I'm extremely unhappy with your work and I will NEVER come back here again - except to wash my hair".

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And that's also because they tried to pacify me by giving me free shampoo and masque (which I genuinely think they already included the cost into my bill) and so, if I brought the shampoo and masque with me when I go for a hair wash, instead of charging me the usual RM45, they will only charge me RM18. Whatever!

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Sigh....

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I look like an alien mop gone wrong now.

Dinner Boo Boo

Mummy made noodles for my dinner tonight and I brought it out to the dining table. I also saw that she left a bowl of pai kuat and sausages in another bowl so I took that out with me as well.

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I popped a sausage into my mouth and started attacking the bowl of noodles. Damn hungry. It was already 10pm and I only had 1901 for lunch this afternoon.

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"Kristy, what did you take out with you?" mummy shouts from the kitchen.

"The noodles and the bowl of meat lah!" I shouted back."

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There was silence.

And then. "You ate from the bowl of meat arr?"

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Me. "Why? I took a sausage lah"

"It's for the dog!"

"WHAT??? How was I suppose to know that!"

"The sausage was from 2 months ago lah, and can't you see the bones under it?"

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I took a closer look into the bowl.

OH MY GAWWWWWWWWWD!!!!

I just ate dog food!!!!

I'm so doomed

I knew I was doomed the day I got pregnant.

Not because I wasn't ready for a child although at that time, I really wasn't ready. I mean, honeymoon was suppose to be in May, and then after that only try for a child but then I found out I was with child in January and it was all because I miscalculated and....anyways, that's old story now.

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Not doomed because my body was gonna bloat up. Well, I wasn't looking forward to having wider hips because my hips then was already wide and all but then again, all women will have to bloat up when pregnant and anyways, I got my body back to the way it was and in fact I'm lighter than before I got pregnant and I lost so much weight that even my double-eyelid-less eye has miraculously formed a double-eyelid whoopeee! which just goes to show how much oil and fat I lost just from my face alone and YES, I AM GLOATING....teeeheehee!

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I knew I was doomed because....

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You know how everyone has a fear of something? And as you all know if you've been following this blog, my biggest fear is for the four-legged, translucent brown, clammy cold thing you people call a lizard which I don't think it even deserves to have a name but anyways, yes, this lizard thing and I have been on-going enemies for the longest time and no matter how much I try to tell myself that there's nothing much to fear about them, I will continue to be afraid of the disgusting things for the rest of my life and there's nothing much anyone can do about it (this sentence is too long I don't know how to end it).

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My other fear is cooking.

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I know right.

Cooking.

Like duh, cooking?

Cooking. Lizard. Cooking. Lizard. Cooking.

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Okay, fine, to be fair to the lizards, I don't actually fear fear cooking. I more like fear the whole process of cooking. Preparing the ingredients. Putting them into the wok. Having oil spit out from the firery pit onto my hands and singe-ing me. And then having the food taste pathetic after the whole process. That fear.

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So because of this fear, I never attempted to cook. Well, once in a while I do but nothing interestingly enough to cause a fire in the kitchen and most of the time when I DO have to cook (like making maggi mee or boiling rice), I use the good ol' microwave.

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Oh yes, I absolutely LURVE the microwave! Without it, I would never be able to fry eggs, or boil rice, or make instant noodles and etc!

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So, you would think, don't like to cook, scared to cook then don't cook lah, right?

I thought so too.

Until I got pregnant. But then, I pushed it away and told myself to cross the bridge only when I get to it.

And then, 2 weeks ago, when I brought Renee for her check-up, her pediac tells me, the next time you come, I will talk to you about bubur for Renee and being the moron that I am, I ask back, what's bubur?

You should have seen the look on FattyHubby's face. It wasn't nice.

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Porridge???!!!

OH.MY.GAWD!!!!

I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO MAKE PORRIDGE!!!!!

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Why can't Renee just drink breastmilk and live on rice cereals forever?

It's just as good as eating bubur right?

They even sell rice cereals with bananas / pears / apples / or whatever you want they have so why would I need to do any cooking?

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Who says boiling porridge does not constitute as cooking? I wil shoot anyone who tells me that okay. I swear I will!

I have to wash the rice right?

I have to put it in a pot, put in the right amount of water and set it to boil right?

It has fire involved right?

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Confirm die!

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BestieKat called me few days ago and I decided to unburden my woes onto her and what does she do? She LAUGHS at me! Hmph!

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And then, she offered to demonstrate it for me one day when I go over to her place. But WHY CAN'T I USE THE MICROWAVE???? I wailed.

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Because it won't be as tasty as doing it the right way. Besides, using microwave is not healthy.

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Tasty? Babies can't taste. If they could, they wouldn't have invented all sorts of different flavored rice cereals right?

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But the one point that hit me was 'not healthy'.

And because of that, I'm doomed.

Doomed to boil porridge for Renee from now onwards.

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Oh, the sacrifices a mother makes for her child!

I cannot live like that lah

O.M.G!!!!

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Remember how just in my last post I mentioned that this Christmas is gonna be the best Christmas ever???

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NOT!!!!

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*sniff*sniff*

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Renée is down with a slight virul infection and is going through slight purging, so I have to change my diet for a bit until she's ok. Meaning...

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No spicy food!

No fried oily stuff!

No alcohol!

No dairy products!

cos I'm breastfeeding mah...

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When the doc told me about this over the phone earlier, I was so cool and okay with it cos it didn't sink in yet. I didn't realize it yet.

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And then later, when I was on the phone with FattyHubby telling him about it (gosh, I can't believe I'm crying as I'm writing this now), it sunk in.

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NO DAIRY PRODUCTS!!!

Which means that I cannot have cupcakes!!!!

And I ordered 50 cupcakes from Naj-Cupcakes.blogspot.com for Christmas because they are so absolutely yummy and have been looking forward to eating them....and now....I can't!

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NAD!!! Do you use butter in your cupcakes???

Because if you do, DON'T!!!!

Then I won't be able to eat.

Then I'll have to stare at everyone else eating your delicious cuppacakes and not be able to touch any.

And on CHRISTMAS DAY TOO!!!!

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How am I suppose to stay away from those cupcakes???!!!

I can't I can't I can't!!!

I'll die.

I'll just crumble down and die.

On.The.Spot.

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No cupcakes?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO............

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My world is falling apart.

It's crumbling down now around me.

And I can see cupcakes everywhere.

Taunting me. Teasing me.

But not coming anywhere near me.

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*sniff*sniff*sniff*

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I can't write anymore....
My tears are blurring my visuals.

I know I damn drama.

But that's because you're not the one that has to abstain from cupcakes, okay!

So gimme a break!

And let me wail as much as I want to about my cupcakes!!!

I'm ADDICTED!!!!

to online shopping.
DIE!
now no need to go out also can go broke.
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in 2 days, I've spent RM200 on 4 items already.
someone PLEASE take the internet away from me.
i'm hopeless!
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someone should just take the internet, laptop AND my purse away from me. That way, I don't get tempted at all to spend any money. Better still, take my car keys and license too!
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sigh....
this is what happens when I'm left all alone at my in-laws', with them fighting to carry Renee away from me and with nothing else to do.
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FattyHubby has gone to check on the defects of our soon-to-be new home.
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Oh, I SOOOOOOOO can't wait to move in!!!
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No more of this hopping between my parents's place and my in-laws'. Hate it!

Fat jeans

I'm so frustrated with FaceBook!!!

It's giving me soooo much problems just trying to upload pictures.

So until it stops giving me problems, nobody will be able to see updated pics of Renée.

Hmph!

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I decided I felt like making a short trip to Pavilion tonight to look for my Zara stuff and decided to get mummy and daddy to come with me so they can help me look after Renée while I shopped. But then I called Zara Pavilion to check if they had what I wanted, they didn't.

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"We don't have to go down to Pavvy tonight anymore," I told dad.

"Why?"

"They don't have what I want"

"What you want?"

"Jeans"

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Dad looks me up and down and then snorts.

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"What for? You so fat. Buy also no use lah".

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Fat. FAT.

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That was like a knife through my heart okay.

Not only did it pierce through.

But it was also a blunt knife.

And it was twisted as it pierced.

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I am SOOOOO GOING ON A DIET!

I want this

AN ELECTRONIC BUG SWATTER THINGY

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So that I can start whacking at all the stupid mosquitoes that somehow managed to escape into my tightly enclosed room and suck my blood.

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It's so annoying really, to be nodding off to sleep and then suddenly, you hear that stupid buzzing sound that only mosquitoes make, flying around your ears. And no matter how much you swing your hands around your ears, the damn thing keeps coming back!

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And then, you end up whacking your own ears and face in the process.

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At least with this swatter thing, I don't have to get up and start clapping my hands at every damn place that I think I saw the mossie flying pass. I can just pick the swatter up and play air tennis. I'm SURE I'd hit the mossie somehow. And then it will die a torturous death of being burnt and eletrocuted alive.

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I can even use the swatter on cockroaches, especially tiny ones that lurks at corners and runs damn fast. And like what XiaXue wrote, it can also be used on adult cockraoches. At least if it doesn't kill them, it'll burn their feelers and leave them directionless and they'll be running around in circles and I can then smash them with a slipper / book / whatever.

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Best of all, it can be used on lizards too!!!! (Claps hand in glee!).

Baby lizards can be bbq-ed alive and if they try to escape by releasing their disgusting small tiny tails, it'll be burnt up too! Ha! Imagine the joy of killing lizards. I'll never have to run in the other direction anymore.

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As for adult lizards, I don't know if it will work on them or not. But at least it will leave them shocked and paralyzed for a while. And while they are recovering from the shock, I can swat them over and over and over again until they eventually die a slow and painful burning death. I seriously think I will enjoy myself squatting next to it and just smacking it repeatedly and watching it slip into eternal death.

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Hmph! That's for trying to scare me by running out from behind bathroom doors. And for appearing out of nowhere while I'm looking through my junk. And for making that annoying, irritating sound that they make ALL the time!!!!

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Someone once told me that lizards are actually guardians and it guards us from ghosts and spirits around us by making that stupid sound and that we should appreciate lizards.

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Well, he can go kiss the lizard all he wants, and if a ghost or spirit comes near me, I'll whack it with the electronic zapper too!

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4D ULTRASOUND SCAN

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I KNOW it's a waste of money, especially when I'm already this close to popping BUT I still want one!!!

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I KNOW it's gonna cost me (okay, fine, FattyHubby) double the amount of a normal 2D scan but c'mon! It's our first baby, and I want to see if the doc is right and if she really looks like FattyHubby instead of me!

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Actually, when I was at week 28, I already asked the doc if we could do a 4D scan, but Renee had her hand covering half her face and was only peeping out from the corner of her hand, so it wasn't worthit to get the 4D.

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Then at week 30, she had her other hand covering the other half of her face so again, cannot do 4D.

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At week 32, totally couldn't see her face. She had her buttocks facing us instead....

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Damn drama princess!

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So I told myself, tried 3 times and 3 times also fail. Which means it's fated lah that we don't waste the money on the 4D scan. But I also KNOW for sure now that we've decided not to waste the money, when I see the doc again next week, she'll be facing the camera fully with a wide smile spread accross her face.

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And when that happens, should we get the scan done or not?

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I'll be at week 34 by then...and only have about another 4 to 6 weeks to go before she pops and I can see her for real. So should we even spend that extra money to do it. Or just wait. I know we should wait...

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but...

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little fingers and little toes, littles eyes and little nose, funny facial expressions and cute body reactions....and all without having to wait 4 to 6 more weeks. *BIG SIGH*

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NEW HAIR COLOUR

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I'm soooooo sick of my own dark brown hair already! This is the longest I've gone without dying my hair and I am already running out of patience. The only reason why I still have not gone and done it is because Fred@LeVie REFUSES to colour my hair for me until AFTER I give birth.

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I even offered to pay him more than his usual charges, but he's stubborn. Won't even budge. Won't even take out the colour chart for me to at least just look at the colours. Of course, I can easily walk into another salon to get it done, but then again, I don't trust anyone else with my hair except for Fred@LeVie and so, that's why my hair is still what it is. B-O-R-I-N-G!!!

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I sms-ed him this morning, telling him to promise me that he will dye my hair for me with any colour I want cause I've been so obedient all these while.

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I've got my sights set on either BLUE

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or

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PURPLE.

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I've decided not to go for red cause I've done that before a looooong time ago. I've also decided not to go for blonde cause I'm not as tanned as before anymore. That's why this time, I'm going for darker colours. But at least they're still not boring.

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And besides, I want to try something new. But not too shocking as well.

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******

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Read this article and it got me thinking.

Why keep arresting Anwar?

If you're so serious about this issue and it's of such offence, why not arrest Saiful as well? After all, it takes two to tango.

Unless Anwar had the poor boy strapped down to the chair.

Such contradictions.

And you call yourselves our political leaders.

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I think political court-jesters suits you more.

Cause you guys really seriously make me laugh!

It's always like that...hmph!

Fine. I admit. I've ran out of things to blog about. Plus. I've become extremely lazy. And there's nothing that attracts me more now. Other than the BED. In the cold air-conditioned room.

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So there. My excuse for the lack of blogs lately.

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But then again. This is MY blogsite. And it's up to me when I want to post something.

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PLUS...

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I'm pregnant. Like 8 months. And. I. AIN'T. NOT. LIKING. IT.

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C'mon. It's so unfair!

I don't understand why it's women that have to suffer from period cramps every month and the men don't have to go through anything. And why it's women that have to go through pregnancy's horrible symptoms (like yours truly here) and the men don't have to. And why is it that even through pregnancy, it's women that have to suffer from backaches, pelvic aches, stretch marks, frequent urination - DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I HAVE TO GO PEE IN AN HOUR??? IT'S NOT ONLY TIRING WALKING AROUND WITH A ONE TONNE BOWLING BALL IN YOUR TUMMY, BUT HAVING TO WALK TO THE TOILET LIKE A FREAKING MILLION TIMES IN ONE HOUR WITH THE BOWLING BALL STUCK TO YOUR TUMMY AND HAVING STREAKS OF PAIN SLICE THROUGH YOUR LOWER BACK AND PELVIC IS NOT FUN LORR!!! - and having to go through the pain of labour when the men don't need to go through any single thing at all? And why is it that after the baby is born, it's the women that have to suffer from sleepless nights and cracked nipples and engorged breasts when nothing happens to the men?

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So unfair!

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I WISH the men would suffer at least a little bit with their women so that they can learn to appreciate their women a little more.

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Sighs.....

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But you know what I think?

I think the reason why I'm in such a foul mood now even with the weekend so close is BECAUSE the weekend is close.

And I especially detest THIS weekend because, as most of you would know by now and if you don't, you're more clueless than I am, it's the RAINFOREST FESTIVAL weekend in Kuching!!!!

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AAAARRRGGGGGHHH!!!!!

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And I'm missing it. Again.

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Already bad enough that I missed last year's cause I was so busy preparing for the wedding. And I promised myself to make it for this year's one. But no. I decided to get pregnant instead. Of all things. I decided to subject myself to the woes of pregnancy.

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So while the whole world is partying away to the sounds of rainforest festival, I'll be partying to the sounds of FattyHubby's snores and little unborn Renee's kicks and hiccups.

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Digress a bit yah.

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Talking about hiccups, Renee has been hiccup-ing a lot lately. Like close to 3 times a day. And I don't know if that's normal. Could it be because I've been drinking so much Coke that the gas are all going to her that's causing her to hiccup uncontrollably?

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So please, mothers out there, if you know why....do share.

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Okay. Undigress.

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Since we're on the subject of babies, let's talk about 3rd party inteference.

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LEAVE US ALONE TO LOOK AFTER THE BABY OUR WAY!!!!

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How are we ever going to gain experience by ourselves if you keep harping on the 'right' way to look after a baby??? What IS the 'right' way anyways? Just because it worked for you does not mean it will work for us. So, how is that the 'right' way?

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And when you say 'right' way, you are referring to when you had a child which was AGES ago. Things have changed now. Technology have advanced. We don't do things the way you used to anymore.

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Let's take for example. You say that a baby should not be put in an infant car seat when he/she is only a few days old. You say that the baby should be carried in the mother's arms while traveling.

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But I say no. I say that it's safer for the baby to be placed in an infant car seat whenever we travel than to be carried in the mother's arms. Doctors say so. Books write so. The amount of horror stories I hear about what happens to babies who are carried in the mother's arms instead of placed in car seats while traveling is enough to tell me what is right and what is wrong.

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So. What IS the 'right' way?

During your era got infant car seats meh? Of course don't have lah. So of course you say carry the baby is safer lah.

But think for a while can. Why did they even invent infant car seats IF carrying the baby is much safer? Invent for what then? To simply waste money issit? People so free meh nowadays?

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Obviously a lot of R&D were put behind the invention of car seats and it was concluded that car seats are a safer mode of tavelling for babies lah.

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So the same goes for your napkins vs diapers.

Old method of sterilizing bottles vs bottle sterilizers.

Sleeping on bed with mother vs sleeping in cot.

Baby cots vs playpens.

Sarongs vs nightgowns.

Bottle feeding vs breast feeding.

You vs Me.

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So. Please. I appreciate all your advices. And you are free to give them to me. But DON'T and NEVER EXPECT me to listen to them if I feel that I can handle things MY own way.

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That's all I ask.

Stop interfering.

My 28th Birthday - whoopeee....

My birthday just came and went *snaps finger* just like that. And now, it's over and I'm officially 2 years away from hitting the big THREE ZERO.

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Life.Is.So.Damn.Unfair.

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I mean, let's rewind back to two years ago.

My birthday was a whirlwind of partying, boozing and puking into big pots - where I ended up being carried back by 3 men - FattyHubby, Patrick and my dad >_<

Yes, MY dad...

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More than 30 friends and family members celebrated the event with me and we had a blast of a time! What with freeflow of whisky and DJ spinning retro music and all.

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Then, one year back.

My group of closest friends threw me a surprise birthday party and we had a good dinner, a great time catching up and also, non-stop booze.

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Then this year.

It was so bleak I thought it was a funeral instead of a birthday.

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Yes, so I'm married.

And yes, so I'm about 7 months pregnant.

But that doesn't mean I still can't have fun right.

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WRONG!

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I can't!

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Not because my husband is boring....trust me, he definitely isn't.

Not because my friends are not happening anymore....they still are.

BUT it's because I get tired soooo easily!

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Which really sucks, you know.

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FattyHubby took the day off last Friday to spend my birthday with me since I was on leave as well. He had the whole day planned out for us.

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Lunch, followed by a whole afternoon of shopping, and then ending the day by bringing me up to Genting for my favourite Durian Tempura.

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Oh, we started off the day according to plan....
We went to Bonton for a nice, cozy lunch.....had the most delicious pie-tee in the world, a huge bowl of Sarawak Laksa, yummy pulut 'tong-sui' for dessert and a slice of absolutely lip-smacking blueberry cheesecake compliments from the chef.

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And then when the husband wanted to bring me shopping, instead of jumping at the opportunity (after all, how often does a husband offer to take a wife shopping), I decided to get tired and sleepy and insisted on going home so that I can nap. DUH!

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And napped I did!

From 3pm all the way to 8pm...so dinner in Genting for my favourite Durian Tempura was out the window as well.

And it wasn't because FattyHubby didn't try waking me up, he did. I just refused to.

So, we ended up in Pyramid at 9.15pm for a quick Korean dinner.

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See......

All because I was tired!!!

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And I get tired ALL THE TIME!!!

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After work, I'm sleeping till 9pm before I wake up for dinner.

And then, I'm alseep again.

On weekends, I'm awake at 12pm...and then by 3pm, I have to sleep again.

And tiredness just hits me when I least expect it.

It just comes, slaps me in the head, and my eyes are closing....be it whether I'm driving, or sitting on the toilet bowl, or eating....whatever.

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SO, that was how I spent my birthday.

SLEEPING!

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Happy Birthday to me!

spunk or dunk?

I dunno whether being pregnant makes you do crazy things but it sure is making me do things that I never for the world of me would think of doing...

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I chopped off my hair and gave it the Halle Berry look.

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YES, I DID!!!

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It's short short short.....so short!!! And the worse part, my stylist taught me how to style it and when he did it for me, it looked pretty damn good, but when I tried it on my own back home, I couldn't do it. I just couldn't.

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So much for Halle Berry.

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Look more like Halle Hairy now....*sighs*....

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But I do like it lah. Just need to learn how to style it properly.

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Next up....hair colour!!!

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It's like I suddenly got nothing to write about cos I'm pregnant.

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I thought lah maybe with pregnancy I would have more things to talk about but nothing seems to come to mind whenever I come into my blog.

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FemmeFatale not so 'Femme' anymore lah...now can call FattyFatale dy.

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My daughter (yes, I'm gonna have a baby girl!) damn drama wei! She's made me and FattyHubby go through a heart attack session at least once a month for the pass 5 months and it's not easy yah. All these emotional traumas.

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I seriously have to think twice about going through this all over again if we plan for number two. But let me get through this first and see if I survive motherhood.

You think I'm a baby making machine?

Now that the wedding is over, I realise that conversations around me, which were always centered around weddings for the pass few months, have now taken a sharp turn and has landed on the topic of babies.

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Yes. BABIES.

And we're talking about only less than a week from the wedding ya.

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Like on Monday night, FattyHubby (previously known only as Fatty) and I brought my new in-laws out for dinner and throughout the entire drive home, my mum-in-law was going on and on and on about "When you're pregnant, you must do.....", "When you're pregnant, you cannot cut anything on....", "You know, when I was pregnant, I was....." and it just went on and on till we got back to the house.

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Aaargh!!! The pressure!!!

We haven't even gone on our honeymoon lah, relax a bit can?

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And then, on Tuesday night, we brought my parents and sisters out for dinner, and the entire conversation during dinner was how mummy gave birth to me...the same old story about her eating too many watermelons and her waterbag broke 8 weeks early and I came out into the world a prematured baby....so poorthing.

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*Rolls eyes*

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Do you feel the pressure now too???

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And then. AND THEN. I called mummy on Thursday night, just to talk to her, update her about my day at work and told her that my dad-in-law was sick but was too stubborn to go see a GP, and you know what she told me???

.

She said, "Tell your father-in-law that he must put importance on his health if he wants to still be alive to see his grandchildren. Must use the grandchildren word as a carrot to dangle in front of him, then he'll be more careful with his health".

.

.

Use MY children as a DANGLING CARROT????

This is so super salah.

.

And then, in the background, I heard daddy come back with some super comeback line to mummy.

.

.

"Dangle what lah. Nanti biji also don't have, what to dangle"

.

>_<'

.

.

I soooo need to go home and lie down now. My head has been pounding non-stop since this morning and I know it's telling me to go back and sleep!

.

.

But I can't.

My boss conveniently RSVP-ed herself and I to go for The Sun & The Edge Annual Party tonight @ Modestos, Desa Sri Hartamas, but you know what the funny thing is, my boss is also conveniently on mc today and I'm left to go all by my lonesome self.

.

Check out what my horoscope for the day says about me today:

.

.

See!!! Even it can tell that I'm not in my usual happy-clappy, super Ms. PR woman mood!.

I SO WANNA GO HOME!!!!

AND SLEEP!!!!!!!

.

Thank goodness I managed to coax DesignerKajen and SuperSalesManFoong to come be my escorts for the night, else I'd die from boredom.

.

"Eh, come follow me for The Sun & Edge --"

"Dowan lah"

"No, but its --"

"Dowan lah"

"Got free flow booze worr"

"Aiyah, why never say earlier! OF COURSE we attend with you"

.

-_-'

.

Idiots

Official in a month

Exactly ONE month from today

.

I'll be

OFFICIALLY

married

.

OFFICIALLY

someone's wife

.

OFFICIALLY

own a husband

.

OFFICIALLY

known as Mrs. Fatty

.

blink blink

.

*Waaaaaaaaailsssss!!!!*

Some bad and some good

So stress until can die.

So many things to arrange for and only 4 weekends to go.

Wish we had more time.

.

Called PrettyInWhite to find out if my designer is back from her maternity leave.

Not until Nov 1st, was the reply.

And I have yet to see both pairs of the shoes they're making for me. And my evening gown. The one and only time I did see it was like 2 and a half months back, and when it was still full off pink round head pins holding it together. I've not even gone my the actual fitting. This is just the evening gown. I haven't even started with the bridal gown.

.

.

We also finally got the wedding bands.

Had to go around the world to look for the rings. The whole incident was just so miserable. Fatty and I fought so much because of it. But I'm not about to go into details about it here. Fatty gets very sensitive sometimes.

.

But all's well now. We managed to find the - well, not exactly perfect - ring, and paid the deposit for it too. We still have to wait a good 3 months for the custom-made rings to be ready for collection. And again, I'm not about to reveal how much the rings cost us because I might just cry. But here's a little hint.

.

.

But no, stressing about the ring and the gown and shoes are considered absolutely nothing, if compared to stressing about the guest list. OMG!!!!

.

THE GUEST LIST!!!

Someone please kill me now.

.

Scenario 1: To woman and husband.

Woman RSVPs back for herself and husband plus 2 kids and 2 maids!!!!

.

Scenario 2: To aunty.

Aunty RSVPs back for herself, her 3 sons, 3 daughter-in-laws, 2 grandchildren and 1 maid!!!!

.

And here I am, slashing down on number of guests and tables as much as I can and these people aren't helping a bit lorr!

.

Can so die right???!!!

.

I mean, where can like that wan?

Invitation to you and hubby, then bring only you and hubby lah.

Invitation to you alone, fine, understandable if you want to bring someone with you, but to bring your entire family! Plus maids!!! I'm surprised you didn't RSVP your dog, your 10 goldfishes AND your neigbour's servants too!!!

.

You think what?

So many tables to house your whole kampung arr. Next time you get married, I'm going to bring my dog's children and my 10 bodyguards as well. Ya lah, I need bodyguards arr. Cannot arr.

.

*Sigh*

Dunno lah. I'm just so mad that people don't know how to use their brains these days. Simple things like that also try to understand a bit lah.

.

I mean, if I had ample tables to give away, fine, you can bring anyone you want to. But I've only got a limited amount of table and the invitation was only to you. Not that difficult to figure out right.

.

See lah, when I do my final round of calls to everyone for their RSVPs, sure mati wan.

.

Anyways, onto happier things.

.

Fatty and I have decided to go to Greece for the honeymoon.

.

.

It's such a lovely place, with all year round Mediteranean weather, so nice for honeymoon kan.

.

.

And I can go visit the temple of Zeus....where my ex-husband, Hercules, was born!!! Soooo nice!

.

I found something interesting to do too

After reading everyone else's blogs and wondering why they're not updating as much as before anymore, I realised they all have ONE same excuse - FACEBOOK! However, like I have admitted before, I'm also addicted to it, therefore, will not be the one to blame them for their lack of blogs.

.

But this time, I'm addicted to something else on FB.

.

I love it I love it I love it I love it!!!

I love it so much that I've been spending too much time DURING office hours designing my own polyvores. You should try it out too you know. Trust me, you'll get hooked.

.

Counting down

36

days to go to the 'BIG' day

oh gaaaaawd

.

I think I'm starting to get wedding jitters.

But I cannot say why.

But I have been acting weird the pass few nights. Feeling restless. And I don't know if it's because of the upcoming nuptials.

.

And I think Fatty is feeling it too.

.

Shit.

This is not going to work, is it?

.

Mummy and Daddy are getting us a honeymoon package to somewhere as our wedding gift. Mummy suggested either Maldives or Kashmir. Fatty suggested Bali :(

I'm suggesting either Switzerland or Vienna.

.

Any other suggestions?

Boleh lah boleh

So, it was last Friday night, when I was rushing home to shower, that I had a conversation with God.

.

This is what He told me:

.

Kristy, I know you'd be extremely excited if I were to tell you that you're gonna have a baby, so that's why I'm here now, having this conversation with you. Eventhough you're only gonna be officially married in less than 2 months, and you're not yet married now, I'm still here to have this talk with you. You have NO TIME, NO MONEY and you're NOT READY to be a mother yet. Therefore, you'll have to keep your excitement till after you're wedded.

.

And then, He disappeared.

.

And I had to drive like a race car driver back home because the waterfall started -_-

.

***

.

Was having dinner at The Curve last night with Ade and some colleagues when some bastard came and switched Ade's laptop bag with an empty one.

.

And we didn't even know it happened or when it happened.

.

We were sitting there from 7.30pm all the way to 9.30pm and we didn't realise anything, until when we were about to leave.

.

Ade: Who's laptop bag is that?

Me: *thinks to myself, duh, yours lah*

Ade: Why is there a laptop bag here???

Me: *blink blink*

Ade: Fuck!!! Someone swtiched my laptop with an empty one!!!

.

And then, she went hysterical.

.

And used a serviette to pick the empty bag up.

.

Ade: We have to send this is to have it dusted for fingerprints!!!!

Me: Malaysia not CSI k.

.

I went with her to the police station to make the report, and when we asked the cop if this happened a lot?, he made us look under his table where he kept a dozen more empty laptop bags.

.

Me: Wah, encik boleh buka gerai jual laptop bag lah!

Ade: Boleh ambil fingerprints dari bag ni ke?

Him: *looks at us like as if we were idiots* Ini Malaysia lah. Mana boleh?

.

So, next time, if your neighbour's house gets broken into, and someone gets murdered and the murderer escapes from it without being caught, and there's nothing no lead at all to start the investigation except for some fingerprints maybe left on the broken glass windows or whatever, don't even think to open your mouth and ask them to dust for fingerprints ya.

.

Cos he's only gonna turn around and say

.

INI MALAYSIA LAH!!! MANA BOLEH???

.

Hmph...

.

MALAYSIA BOLEH!!!

I can STILL draw better

First thing I did when I logged on today was to click into FaceBook...
to be slapped with the sight of THIS!!!!!

..
on Fatty's profile!

.

Who the FUCK was this woman who dared to write this on Fatty's FunWall???

Who the FUCK was she to think that she can declare her love to him in public???

And you're fucking right you can't draw for nuts!!!

I mean, have you seen what I drew for him???!!!

.

.

So go hide yourself in some hole and don't even come out alright!

.

UmaAnn walked passed me later that day when I was still fuming.

.

Me: Do you know who (mentions name) is?

He: *weird smile* Why?

Me: Do you know or not?

He: *still with that weird smile* Why lah?

Me: Because, she wrote I LOVE YOU on Fatty's FaceBook!!!!

He: *laughs*

Me: *frowns even more*

He: She's AnnUma's cousin lah

Me: So! That doesn't give her the right to declare her love to Fatty!

He: She wrote it to everyone on her contact list

Me: Oh *blush*

.

Way to go, stupid Femme.

3 days late

but i KNOW it's coming.

i can feel the cramps, i feel bloated all over and everywhere hurts.

so there's absolutely nothing for me to worry about.

i'm just annoyed with the fact that it's late and i'm suffering for nothing.

.

well...
i'll give myself up till end of this week.

and if it's still not here yet, i'm marching myself straight to the nearest pharmacy.

and i WILL drag Fatty with me.

.

***

.

i'm addicted to FaceBook.

i'm sooo addicted to it i actually can't sleep at night if don't log on more than thrice a day.

.

Was out at Wine@Nine last night with UmaAnn, AnnUma, Stevie, Jo and Fatty (entirely a LAST MINUTE plan of course)

.

UmaAnn: Eh, your boss don't say anything when you stroll in at 10am in the morning arr?

Me: *blink blink*

Jo: Aiyoh, she work until 8pm at night, of cos won't scold lah

Fatty: Yah, but from 4pm onwards, she's on FaceBook

AnnUma: *laughs out hysterically*

Me: >_<'

.

Was suppose to have an early night last night, so had a quiet dinner in SS2.

Lagi I was only wearing shorts, a white tee, with one bandaged ankle (yes, I sprained it, please don't ask how) with absolutely NO MAKE-UP!!!

And bumped into someone we so did not expect to see
and was dragged into Bambo09.....or Bombay as the drunkard called it.

.

I ended up creeping-limping out when drunkard wasn't looking.

So happy!

And because of that, I managed to get to work on time today.

.

HARR HARR!!!

Damn lazy lah

So lazy to download the pictures from Redang lah.

Snapped too many pictures, now dunno which ones I wanna keep and which ones that should be tendang-ed out.

.

But Redang. GORGEOUS!

So gorgeous, I didn't wanna come back.

And

I got my tan.

And I'm loving it *winks*

.

Pictures should be up soon I hope depending on how lazy I am, and I have to admit, I am getting extremely lazy these days.

.

Plus, a big-ass zit which plopped itself nicely on the top right side of my lip is beginning to turn white and it hurts like hell!

And I'm too pussy to burst it myself.

.

But BIG shout out to FlightyHsiaoJean and BeerDrinkerHeather (previously known as FeatherHeather. She's not that featherish afterall).

.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DARLINGS!

.

I know I just came back from the island, but I'm off to the beach again in 2 weeks!

.

>_<'

.

I know I know

But it's the LAST opportunity for us to go Cherating before AuntyLuan officially sells off her resort by Sept 30th.

.

The feeling is like losing a home to go back to.

SNIFF

Guess we have to start looking for another home to go to now.

.

I'm thinking

KOH SAMUI

.

.

Gotta love it, no?